Reality can be very difficult to deal with, especially when you’ve believed something for a really long time only to watch it crumble right in front of you. When we were young, our parents had compiled a list of white lies to provide us with answers to some really difficult questions to maintain our innocent livelihood. They didn’t want to disclose information that could potentially dampen our spirits and scar our innocent little minds. The scarring had to take place gradually, when we were old enough to see the world for what it is, to toughen our minds to carry out decisions that will be necessary to secure our future.
did Daddy go? Will he be back?”
“Of course he will. Just have faith Timmy.”
That’s what we say to the two-year-old who lost his father.
Lies like those are necessary in such situations. No one in their right mind would tell a kid that his dad was at a strip club and hasn’t been back for a month, fearing the worst. Strip clubs are meant to be a fun place that offer overpriced beer and display semi-nude women twirling on poles, emptying our wallet with every revolution.
Timmy: Yeah, this is where my Dad was last spotted, at the- wait a minute, is that Dad? DAD?
Dad: Yeah baby who’s your daddy…Huh? Who’re you?
Timmy: Dad its me! Timmy! I’m your son! We all thought you were dead!
Dad: I’m dead? My son? What are you blabbering on about! My son Timmy is two years old! You are a grown ass man, who you think you’re tryna fool?
Timmy: That was 18 years ago! God, everyone’s going to be so thrilled to see you!
Dad: 18 years? You’re telling me I spend 18 years of my life away from my family holed up in this strip club?
Dad: Oh God, I’m so sorry I mean I’m really…is your mother still alive?
Timmy: Yes. She’s fine.
Its mostly done with good intentions, either when we have to preserve our positions or prevent any sort of psychological harm from taking place.
Children are fragile, so we hide them from the horrors of the world, until they’re old enough to stand on their own two feet. That was a figure of speech. Just because toddlers learn to walk by the time they’re 9 months old doesn’t mean you can talk to them about the mysteries of life and take them to strip clubs.
I Wanna Grow Up Fast!
For kids and teenagers, it makes sense to rifle out a couple of white lies to keep them in check, but it becomes a problem when those bullets are used to tranquilize adults. Its an even bigger problem if it actually succeeds in tranquilizing them.
Kids hope they become adults quickly because the way they see it, adults can do whatever they want like, get a licence, get a job, live by themselves, no mom or dad to lecture them, sleep at whatever time they want, and basically make all the rules.
What they are blind to is the responsibilities that comes along with being an adult.
Got a driving license? Then its your responsibility to drive safely.
Got a job? Now its your responsibility to get your finances in order and give some back to the family and society that raised you.
Started living by yourself? Its your responsibility to see to it that you keep your health in check by maintaining a proper diet and finding a proper way to adjust yourself.
So how about it kids, you still want to grow up?
Freedom without responsibilities is oxymoronic. They come in a package, and if you take only what you want, then it will come to bite you back one day.
You can’t splurge your finance on an expensive car, going on trips, or getting wasted every weekend, and expect life to take care of the rest. That’s how children think.
Being an adult is about maintaining balance. You get the freedom if you fulfill the responsibilities you have to your family, work and yourself. Tip the balance towards only fulfilling your desires, and you will suffer tremendously for it. Narcissism never pays, unless you’re filthy rich, which most of us aren’t.
But there are no Adults now, just overgrown children. People my age, laugh at me when I talk to them about personal growth, because all they want is to do is get high and party till the sun goes down. The only “personal growth” that takes place is when they’re trying to rub one out.
They self-medicate with white lies, thinking they can live the best of both worlds. This is why they’re miserable. The very fact that white lies are potent enough to work on 21st century adults shows how immature we are.
“Don’t worry sweetie, you can get married after you hit your late 40s. Menopause is a scam marketed by the patriarchy to fool women into marrying early.”
“Don’t worry pumpkin, women don’t like ridiculously masculine men who are driven by a strong sense of purpose and work towards fulfilling them, all they really want is a guy who cares.”
“Don’t worry cupcake, so what if you’re diabetic? It’s not like anyone has died from diabetes. Here, have another cupcake.”
Its easy to brush problems aside, hoping it will settle somewhere else, but the winds of reality will blow them back to you. The only escape from them is by facing them head on. If you’re a diabetic, exercise is mandatory. There are no if’s and but’s about it, you make time for it and work at it or else it will cripple you. If you are a weak-willed sorry excuse for a man, no women will date you. She isn’t going to make herself available to a man who is content with living like a couch potato, nor is she going to put in the effort to make herself look pretty for a man who won’t work on himself. If you disagree then you’ve been overdosing on those white lies. The proof is all around you, you’re just too high to notice it.
If you’ve aged well past your fertile years and expect a knight in shining armor to carry you off into the sunset and live happily ever after, there’s a pretty good chance that the first few bits could happen. But don’t be shocked when he takes of his helm, armor and cape, exposing his beer belly, receding hair line, toothless smile and his fat ass. Of course, none of that matters since its whats on the inside that counts right? You occupy the higher strata of the moral high ground, and have been gifted by God Almighty himself with the ability to pierce right through a man’s soul and see him for what he is.
“So what if he looks like Shrek? I’m sure he’d make a good father.” said no women ever.
But we’d like to believe those lies and tranquilize ourselves with them, hoping those dreams will show up when we are deep in sleep.
Don’t lie to yourself.
It gets you nowhere.
And nowhere is all you’ll ever be, for the rest of your life.